Monday, February 14, 2011

Love & Marriage

Nonfiction:
1.  Dr. John Gottman & Nan Silver: The Seven Principles of Making Marriage Work 
2.  Po Bronson: "Why Do I Love These People?": Understanding, Surviving, and Creating Your Own Family
3.  Judith Wallerstein, Julia Lewis, Sandra Blakeslee: The Unexpected Legacy of Divorce: A 25 Year Landmark Study
4.  Eric Weiner: The Geography of Bliss: One Grump's Search for the Happiest Places in the World
5.  Laurence Gonzales: Deep Survival: Who Lives, Who Dies, and Why

Fiction:
6.  Anne McCaffrey: Crystal Singer (series) & Freedom's Landing (series)
7.  Robert Heinlein: Friday
8.  Jennifer Crusie: Crazy For You

Something Else:
9.  Kahlil Gibran: The Prophet
10. Elizabeth Gilbert: Eat Pray Love

Focus for this list:
Yes, I'll admit, one can (fairly easily) see from this list that, as a child of divorce, I have some issues with love, commitment, and marriage.  My general approach when something scares me silly is to do research; thus the extensive nonfiction selections.  If the nonfiction list delves into the nitty gritty of what can go wrong (and how to avoid having things go wrong) then the fiction gives visions of what love can be. 

Relationship lessons I've learned from reading Anne McCaffrey's books? 
1. Things work out in the end, if both are willing to work hard at it, but it may take several books to get there. 
2. Partnerships work best when strengths are balanced and complementary. 
3.  Love pops up in some unexpected places!

Lessons from Robert Heinlein:
1. Family (& humanity) is what you make of it.
2. A little sexual mischief is always fun!

Lessons from Jennifer Crusie:
1.  Reach for happiness, even if you can't see how you'll there from here.
2.  Always adopt the stray dog.  ;)

 And that, my friend, is my list of books that have influenced my view of love and marriage.  I've been married (quite happily) now for 5 months and 9 days! 

Happy Valentine's Day, and may we all one day be free to marry whomever we love. 
-Mrs. Turkey Bird

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